Tuesday, 10 July 2012

Retribution of Nonsense

If you get a longing for Benidorm,
it’s crucial, early doors, you realize
the wild pigs of Gaia could burgle your home.

The best looking sow will pick-the-locks, some
porkers will look-out (with piggy eyes)
while you get in the car for Benidorm.

Grunting swine in bed will be the norm
and shitting in the yard to attract flies
when the wild pigs of Gaia burgle your home.

They’ll snout your whiskey, watch some piggy-porn;
hog truffles, popcorn, apples and pork pies
when you are in the air for Benidorm.

Your bath and pillows will be rancid, warm,
with ham and eggs and sausages and fries;
the wild pigs of Gaia have burgled your home.

Drink Oloroso in the aerodrome
while big bad wolves are howling at the skies
and if you get an urge for Benidorm,
the wild pigs of Gaia will burgle your home.


  1. Nice :) Best be lockin' the doors!

  2. At age fourteen, not quite a man,
    I packed a bag and away I ran.
    On a mixed farm I soon found work,
    Feeding pigs, to make them pork.
    Soon I found out, to my surprise,
    Piggies DON'T have piggy eyes!
    Each pig's a clever little beast,
    More so 'Large white' sows , to say the least!

    There; my intro, maestro. I have been given your site details by an author whose works I rudely criticised in my guise as a would-be proofreader. My problem now, is that almost anything I see, generates poetry in my head.Anne thinks some-one on your side of the world may be able to help me with the suggested course of publishing any of my work. I need to talk with some-ne in a manner that my brain can cope with. (email,I would have hoped, but I could not see an address on this blog. Help, please?

  3. It's easy to see that I'm not an author yet! I FORGOT TO COPYRIGHT MY WORK.
    ergo; Copyright 2012 Rob Van De Laak. For my little piggy poem. ( you should see the other 5 verses that flowed straight after this...)